Learn how to overcome learned helplessness, stop feeling powerless, break free from uncontrollable situations, and change your situation for a better mindset.
Have you ever felt stuck or powerless, like no matter what you do, nothing changes? That feeling of helplessness is what psychologists call learned helplessness, first studied by Maier and Martin Seligman. It can really take a toll on your self-esteem, lead to negative thought patterns, and sometimes even contribute to anxiety or depression.
Learned helplessness often shows up after going through repeated negative events you can’t control. Over time, people may stop trying or feel helpless even when there’s a real chance to change the situation. A pessimistic explanatory style or sense of lack of control can make someone more likely to experience it.
The good news? Learned helplessness isn’t permanent. With tools like cognitive behavioural therapy or CBT, learned optimism, and building resilience, people can start to take action again. Keep reading to see practical ways to overcome learned helplessness and feel more in control.
In 1967, Professors Martin Seligman and Steven F. Maier first described learned helplessness through experiments showing how repeated uncontrollable events can shape the way we think, feel, and act.
Their work helps explain why we sometimes feel stuck or powerless, even when there are opportunities to change. Understanding this theory makes it easier to see how learned helplessness can develop and why it affects both thoughts and behaviour.
Contingency is about the connection between what you do and the results you get. Learned helplessness occurs when that link seems unreliable or nonexistent.
Cognition refers to how people interpret situations and their ability to control outcomes. Awareness that your efforts don’t influence results shapes feelings of learned helplessness.
Behaviour describes the passive or avoidant actions that result from learned helplessness. When someone believes that trying is pointless, they may stop taking action, even when opportunities exist.
Feeling stuck or powerless can sometimes be more than just a temporary mood—it might be part of learned helplessness. First studied in experiments by Maier and later explored by Martin Seligman and Steven, the concept of learned helplessness is a psychological phenomenon that can affect your mental health and sense of control. Recognizing it is the first step toward understanding your reactions and regaining agency in your life.
Learned helplessness happens when people go through repeated negative events they can’t control, leading them to believe that nothing will change, no matter what they do. It can show up as:
Research shows learned helplessness may also develop in adulthood, not just in childhood, and it can sometimes contribute to stress disorder or post-traumatic stress disorder.
There are a few reasons why learned helplessness can develop:
This cycle can make someone feel like nothing will ever improve, even when there are chances to change their situation.
Learned helplessness can happen to anyone:
Learned helplessness occurs when people feel powerless after repeated uncontrollable events. It can affect both children and adults and lead to depression, anxiety, or stress disorder. Knowing the main causes helps explain feelings of learned helplessness and ways to combat it.
Going through abuse or neglect—like domestic violence or being ignored as a child—can make you feel like your actions don’t matter. Learned helplessness may develop because these experiences create feelings of learned helplessness that stick around for a long time.
We all face challenges, but when setbacks keep piling up—at school, work, or relationships—it can really shake your confidence. Learned helplessness occurs when repeated failures make you feel that trying is pointless.
Life is unpredictable, but living in really unstable situations—like a chaotic household, sudden changes, or societal instability—can make anyone feel powerless. Learned helplessness can develop because it seems like no matter what you do, outcomes are beyond your control.
A lot of learned helplessness starts when we’re kids. If children don’t get help or are overprotected, they might feel like their efforts never matter.
How we think about ourselves matters a lot. Negative thought patterns or low self-esteem can make you feel like nothing you do matters, which contributes to learned helplessness.
Even as adults, things can make us feel stuck. Chronic illness, toxic relationships, or repeated setbacks can add to learned helplessness.
Learned helplessness can often make you feel like no matter what you do, nothing changes. Research suggests that learned helplessness can affect your thoughts, motivation, and behaviour, and spotting the signs early—like in the first experiment and other learned helplessness experiments—can help you start taking back control.
This is the core feeling that nothing you do matters. Learned helplessness can feature this sense of powerlessness, making even small tasks feel impossible.
You might notice yourself avoiding challenges or giving up quickly. Learned helplessness can often lead to this kind of passive behaviour, even in situations you could handle.
It’s common to think setbacks are permanent or that everything goes wrong because of you. Research suggests that learned helplessness strengthens these negative thought patterns over time.
Feeling like you’re not capable or that your efforts are useless can really weigh on you. Learned helplessness can feature this low self-esteem, making it harder to try new things.
Even when opportunities to change are there, learned helplessness can often make you feel stuck or frozen.
Things you used to care about might feel like a drag, and you might put less effort into them. Learned helplessness can feature this lack of motivation, keeping the cycle going.
You may give up faster than you used to on challenges. Learned helplessness can often make it hard to stick with goals.
Sometimes you stop reaching out for support because you feel it won’t make a difference. This behaviour was also observed in early learned helplessness experiments.
Repeated setbacks can leave you feeling constantly frustrated. This reinforces the cycle of helplessness.
Making choices can feel overwhelming, and it can be hard to see alternatives. Learned helplessness can feature this rigidity, making action feel impossible.
The learned helplessness theory shows that when people feel like they cannot control what happens to them, it can really affect their mental health. These feelings of learned helplessness can quietly shape how someone thinks, feels, and acts.
Learned helplessness can feel like being stuck in quicksand—you try to move, but it feels like nothing works. The good news is, you can unlearn it and slowly build resilience, one step at a time.
When you’re caught in a pessimistic explanatory style, it’s easy to believe nothing will ever change. CBT is really helpful here because it teaches you how to catch those thoughts and replace them with ones that give you a little more hope and control.
Helplessness often makes people stop trying, like “why bother?” Setting tiny, realistic goals—like finishing a chore or reaching out to a friend—can remind you that your actions do matter. Each small win builds back your sense of control.
Resilience isn’t something you wake up with; it’s built little by little. Things that help include:
Everyone’s different, but a combination of approaches can really help:
Learned helplessness can affect children, teens, and adults, but it doesn’t have to be permanent. With the right guidance, support, and strategies, you can unlearn helplessness, rebuild your self-esteem, and start feeling in control again.
Learned helplessness can feel like being stuck in a cycle you can’t escape, but it doesn’t have to stay that way. Once you start noticing how it shows up in your thoughts and feelings, you can slowly break that pattern and take back a sense of control.
Even small steps—like challenging those “nothing will ever change” thoughts or setting tiny goals—can make a big difference. Over time, you’ll build resilience, especially if you practice coping skills, lean on people who support you, and remind yourself of the things you’ve already overcome.
Therapy, mindfulness, or even simple self-care can help ease the weight of feeling powerless. And the most important part? You’re not stuck forever—you really can unlearn helplessness and find your strength again.
Learned helplessness isn’t officially a mental health condition, but it can have a huge impact on your mental health.
Psychological state: It’s more like a mindset that develops when you’ve faced too many situations where nothing you did seemed to matter.
Mental health link: Over time, it can feed into depression, anxiety, or even stress disorders.
Daily impact: You might stop trying to solve problems, even when there are real chances to change things.
Vulnerability: That helpless feeling can make you more likely to struggle with other mental health challenges.
Not exactly—it’s not a diagnosis you’ll see in a psychology manual, but it definitely plays a role in mental health struggles.
Not in manuals: It’s not listed as a mental health condition like depression or anxiety.
Psychological response: Instead, it’s a way your mind reacts after facing too many uncontrollable setbacks.
Mental health effects: That state of helplessness may also lead to depression, anxiety, or even post-traumatic stress disorder.
Practical view: Think of it less as a condition and more as a harmful pattern of thinking and reacting that can take a toll.
A pessimistic explanatory style is basically a habit of explaining bad events in the worst way possible, and it really fuels learned helplessness.
Explanations of failure: It’s when you blame yourself for setbacks, think they’ll never end, and feel like they affect every part of your life.
Reinforcing beliefs: That kind of thinking convinces you that nothing will ever change.
Cycle of helplessness: It keeps you stuck in learned helplessness because it chips away at your hope.
Emotional weight: After a while, it can feel exhausting and leave you powerless.
Living with learned helplessness can wear you down—it hits your confidence and your quality of life.
Self-esteem: You begin to doubt yourself and feel like your efforts aren’t worth anything.
Behavioural effects: That might make you give up faster or avoid challenges altogether.
Mental health: It usually goes hand in hand with depression, anxiety, or stress disorders.
Overall well-being: Work, school, and relationships can all take a hit when you’re stuck in that cycle.
The good news is that learned helplessness can be unlearned. It just takes small steps and the right support.
Cognitive tools: Therapy like CBT helps you catch and change those negative thought patterns.
Small wins: Setting tiny, doable goals shows you that your actions really can make a difference.
Learned optimism: Tuning your perspective little by little builds hope again.
Resilience skills: Things like mindfulness, stress management, or even exercise can help you feel stronger.
Support system: Having friends, family, or a therapist in your corner makes the journey easier.
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.
Explore the best questions to ask to get to know someone better. From fun icebreakers to deep and personal questions, start meaningful conversations and build stronger connections.
What is lust: definition, signs, its impact, and understanding strong sexual desire, how lust differs from love, sexual gratification, and sinful urges.
Try these fun and meaningful How Well Do You Know Me questions, perfect for friends, family, and couples. Strengthen bonds, spark conversations, and enjoy quality time together.
Know who you want to book with?
Book Online HereHave questions about counselling or something else?
Call or email us.
Want help choosing the right therapist? Complete our connect form below.
We are ready and looking forward to meeting you. Get started today by clicking the link below and booking your free 15-minute discovery call. All our services are private and confidential.
Disclaimer: Content on this website is for informational purposes only. Visiting this website does not establish any type of therapist-client relationship with Upstream Counselling or its staff. Information obtained from this site does not substitute for a thorough medical and/or psychiatric evaluation by an appropriately credentialed and licensed professional.