Are you over-functioning in your relationship?
Are you with the right person that you can get your needs met? What we have learned over the years is that every relationship is a negotiation.
Can we find enough common ground – can you form a well formed goal and agree on that you will go in the same direction?
At the end of the “tunnel” is better connection, less conflict, deeper intimacy, as well as better conflict resolution.
The Pursue/Withdraw dilemma
- Its very hard to have a relationship. That’s a pattern.
- one person wants the other one to open up and the other one wants to be let alone.
- One person often feels like they have to ‘satisfy’ the other persons, and the other feels like that person is controlling… the first person feels like he doesn’t help… its like having another child…
Life stages & crisis
- The marriage dies, so that the family is born. The wife becomes the mom… she is exhausted, not as attractive as before, her needs aren’t met…
- The women focuses on the kids, the guy at work because he doesn’t feel like he has a role…
- You maybe don’t have the money, a grandma to keep the kids etc…
Coming to a point of decision
- Sometimes decide to stay together or breakup.
Working together for a relationship that meets our own and the other persons need.
- Take personal responsibility – take maximum ownership.
- Creating a place of intimacy/safety. If I call you, will you come. How do we build a deep enough trust.
- Having a shared goals.
- Tools
“What if the counsellor takes my partner’s side?”
- Accepting that there is a problem. We’re not in crisis… (you don’t have to be in crisis, but could it be better? Will you wait to hit rock bottom?)“We’re not in crisis”
- I don’t want to get ganged up on, I just caught cheating, I don’t need to be judge, criticize, feel bad even more for…
“We’re not in crisis”
- …
Start With A 15min Call
You might not be sure if we are the right fit for you, you maybe don’t know which therapist you should go with? This 15min session is going to help you find the right therapist and decide if working with us is a fit for you.
We have immediate openings available to support growing demand. Book your free discovery call today